


Latent Heat

by RcA



Series: Hearts On Fire [3]
Category: Big Bang (Band)
Genre: Alpha!Seunghyun, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Animal Traits, Animal hybrids, Cat!Daesung, Dog!Seunghyun, Established Relationship, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Friends With Benefits, Knotting, M/M, Male self-lubrication, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Omega Verse, Omega!Daesung, Other Vaguely Implied Pairings, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-01
Updated: 2017-07-01
Packaged: 2018-11-18 00:03:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11279556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RcA/pseuds/RcA
Summary: Warm hands close around his, Daesung's gentle heat seeping in, and for a few precious moments Seunghyun is home.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A sequel to [Fever Pitch](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10450350). Please read that one and [Where There Is a Flame](http://archiveofourown.org/works/11043861) first.
> 
> Another one for this 'verse, because while I don't _mean_ to continue adding to it, somehow more parts keep finding their way in. Set in May 2017. Also, here's to conveniently pretending TOP's marijuana mess never happened.
> 
>  **Disclaimer:** This is a fictional work based on the public personas of real people, over whom I make no claim and to whom I mean no harm. Just having a little fun with them.
> 
>  
> 
> _latent heat: (physics) the energy transfer required for a change of state, causing a liquid to freeze (by taking heat out) or a solid to melt (by putting heat in)_
> 
> _latent: (biology) lying dormant or hidden until circumstances are suitable for development or manifestation; concealed_  
> 

 

 

 

The door opens a crack, one familiar, dark eye peering out at him through the gap. A second later it swings open, and there stands Daesung, gaping at him in shock. Seunghyun perks up.  
  
"Surprise!" he sings, grinning like a fool.  
   
"How are you--" Daesung flounders, his normally small eyes comically wide. "You're here? Now? _How?_ "  
   
"I'm on leave for a week. What, I didn't tell you?"  
   
The way Daesung stares at him like he's seeing a ghost, his furred ears pointing at the ceiling, the hairs on his tail standing on end in fright... To Seunghyun it feels an awful lot like he snuck up on him, which always fills him with cheer.  
   
Daesung is so much fun to play pranks on. His reactions never leave him wanting.  
   
"No, you didn't!" he cries, and Seunghyun bites his lip to keep from bursting into laughter as his face races through a range of emotion. Disbelief turns to doubt, then dismay.  
   
"...Why didn't you?"  
   
"I didn't tell anyone," Seunghyun explains, taking pity on him. It's all fun and games until someone is nearing tears. "Don't look so hurt. I'm just messing with you."  
   
Daesung laughs then, delighted.  
   
"Alright, you got me," he admits and moves aside. "Come in, come in!"  
   
"You're my first stop though. First to know."  
   
"Oh-- really?"  
   
Seunghyun tips his head to one side sweetly and brings his shoulders up too, everything about him screaming _cute_. It's not really behavior befitting of an alpha but the fans eat it up-- and he knows Daesung does too.  
   
"Happy late birthday?"  
   
"Hyuuung," Daesung half-laughs half-whines, eyes crinkling up in mirth. "You don't have to. You already wished me an early birthday."  
   
Seunghyun had, the final day of Daesung's tour. A longer-than-usual break that morning had allowed him the time to make a quick call, wishing him luck with the concert and the happiest of birthdays a few days in advance. Daesung's busy schedule that morning had meant a shorter call than he had hoped for, so he'd used his remaining time to call up the others too, one after another. All talks had been rather short and sweet, mainly due to time constraints, but it had been nice to hear their voices again.  
   
Of course, by that evening the rest of the world knew about it, courtesy of Seungri's big mouth.  
   
It wasn't like he'd been actively trying to keep it a secret-- not like he'd done anything _wrong_ by calling them on his break-- so the slip hadn't bothered Seunghyun. But the way Daesung had come to his defense had been sweet.  
   
"Yeah," he says, "And I would have wished you one again on your actual birthday, too, if I'd had a free moment," Seunghyun laments. "Never could catch a break though. Prepping for a week off and all. Sorry."  
   
Daesung shakes his head. "No, don't be sorry. You know I don't even really like celebrating my birthday. Just..." He rubs at his shoulder awkwardly. "I hope you didn't get me anything. We all stopped doing that so long ago..."  
   
Seunghyun slides in close then, hands going to Daesung's arms and closing over his biceps, a lascivious grin painting his face.  
   
"What if I told you I got you something really big this year?"  
   
"Please tell me you didn't."  
   
Seunghyun fans his arms out wide, as if presenting himself.  
   
"Just me." He waggles his eyebrows. "If you know what I mean."  
   
_But this isn't just a once-a-year thing,_ he adds silently. _You can have it any time you want. All you gotta do is ask and it's yours. **I'm** yours._  
   
That part he keeps to himself.  
   
Daesung seems to love it, collapsing against him, shoulders shaking with laughter, and it's music to Seunghyun's ears, his voice big and booming and colored with amusement. He gazes down at the man in his arms, at the top of his head where it's pushing into his chest. Satisfaction pulls a sigh out of him, the joyful sound and sight giving his spirits a much-needed lift.  
   
"I hope you're not laughing at the part where I said _big_ ," he sulks.  
   
Daesung straightens up, shaking his head.  
   
"Not really. It's just... really great to have you back, hyung. Anyway," he says, grinning from ear to ear, "you should have said something. What if I hadn't been here?"  
   
"You're _always_ here."  
   
"True." Then, "Do the others know you're out?"  
   
"Out? You make it sound like I just got out of prison," Seunghyun huffs."When, in fact, I've been putting people _in_ prison."  
   
"You have not!" Daesung says, giving him a playful shove. Then, when Seunghyun doesn't answer, he asks, softly like it's a secret, "...Have you?"  
   
"No," Seunghyun comes clean. "They don't let me do anything even half that exciting." Not yet anyway. Just because he's in the police force doesn't mean he's out working the streets; his job these days consists mostly of paperwork. A far cry from his idol lifestyle that, for the time being, he's had to leave behind.  
   
Speaking of...  
   
"I am in the band though."  
   
"Yeah, you told me that much, at least." Daesung teases, and Seunghyun loves the way his eyes sparkle when he's in the mood to bite back. He appreciates that Daesung is always so kind to him, but their bantering-- honest, uninhibited, _fun_ \-- gives him life.  
   
"Guess I should be grateful you tell me anything," Daesung continues, his expression positively devious. "Office Choi, too busy to give us lowly citizens the time of day."  
   
"Don't be a brat," Seunghyun growls and moves to ruffle his hair, but Daesung is too fast-- he wiggles away until he's just out of reach. Big Bang's very own escape artist. Of the five of them, no one dodges or deflects what he doesn't want to deal with quite like Daesung.  
   
"Done any of our songs yet?"  
   
"No, but some of the guys are practically begging me to teach them. Pretty sure it's only a matter of time."  
   
Daesung makes a soft sound of agreement, so Seunghyun takes that as his cue to continue.  
   
"Anyway, you're the first to know. Well," he amends, "The first in the band. My mom already knows." He'd visited her first, before anyone. Technically, Daesung is his second stop.  
   
He hadn't planned on it being a long visit, just in case his surprise house call caught Daesung at a bad time, but if all goes well... he's certainly open to staying awhile.  
   
"Well, you look good," Daesung says, giving him a once-over. "Police life is treating you well, I take it?"  
   
"Yeah, it's... it's not too bad. Thanks." Seunghyun's face heats, and god, who knew such a simple compliment could make him so shy?  
   
He can't stand it anymore. Daesung got away from him once, but he's is nothing if not persistent. Seunghyun lunges and pulls his friend into a strong hug.  
   
"It's great to see you again. I missed you," he says into his shoulder.  
   
Strong arms wrap around him and hold on tight, squeezing with just the right amount of strength to make Seunghyun feel more than just loved-- he feels _wanted_. Like maybe he hasn't been the only one yearning to meet again. Maybe he isn't alone in carrying a small flame in cupped hands and sheltering it, nurturing it, keeping it lit.  
   
...Keeping it contained. Because if he doesn't, it might grow beyond his control. Might _consume_ him.  
   
"Hyung," Daesung mewls, mournful, "I'm still sad that I couldn't see you off the day you left. My heat has bad timing. The worst." His grip on Seunghyun tightens. "Or really good timing, I guess. The one time I really wanted it to be late, it had to be right on time."  
   
Seunghyun thinks back to what happened the last time Daesung's heat had come late. He doesn't think his battered and bruised heart can survive a shock like that a second time.  
   
"Careful what you wish for," he warns, and untangles himself so that he can gather up Daesung's hands in his, playing with his fingers while he relives how they'd looked curved protectively over his belly, shielding something that wasn't there.  
   
Of course, they hadn't known that at the time.  
   
His mother and Jiyong had been his escorts to the training camp. Daesung had wanted to tag along, and of course Seunghyun would have invited him, but signs of his coming heat were difficult to miss and even harder to ignore-- the scent of sex wafting off him, a potent cocktail of _come hither_ sure to make crazy with need not only Seunghyun but every other alpha in the vicinity as well. Having him present for the send-off hadn't been an option. For his own good, and everyone else's.  
   
"That's life, I guess," Daesung says, gazing down at their joined hands with a thoughtful expression. "But hey, you're here now. Let's celebrate."  
   
Warm hands close around his, Daesung's gentle heat seeping in, and for a few precious moments Seunghyun is home.

 

 

\--

 

 

They spend the next hour or so catching up over a bottle-- well, half a bottle, finishing up together what Daesung had started alone, before Seunghyun's arrival, nearly half of it gone.  
   
"You've started early." Seunghyun picks up the bottle and takes a whiff.  
   
Daesung plucks a glass off the dining room table and pours. And even with Daesung before him, in the flesh, Seunghyun can't tear his eyes away from the dark liquid filling the glass.  
   
"This is my time off. After concluding a wildly successful tour, I think I'm allowed to unwind with a little wine." He raises his glass in a toast of sorts. "Winding down by wining it up."  
   
"Wildly successful," Seunghyun repeats, rolling the words over his tongue, wrapping his lips around them, tasting them. Not something he would expect to hear from Daesung. "Is that you speaking or the wine?"  
   
Daesung holds the glass to his lips for a moment, giving it some thought.  
   
"I don't mean to brag, but..." he says into his drink, his voice going soft in that way it does when he's speaking from the heart, "YG actually said that to me. After the tour. They're not my words or the wine's. They're his."  
   
"Wow." Seunghyun grins, genuinely happy for him. "Well shit, you should be bragging about that. He doesn't hand out praise like that to just anyone."  
   
"...Yeah." Daesung's shy but pleased grin is just visible over the rim of his glass. "So maybe there will be more for me down the road. Not sure what, but... yeah. There's a chance. A pretty good one."  
   
"Don't sound so stunned." _I never doubted you._ "I said you'd be great, didn't I?"  
   
Daesung shakes his head-- as always, determined to turn down every compliment that comes his way-- and Seunghyun knows he's gushing but damnit, Daesung did good and he deserves to know it.  
   
"I was cheering for you. Didn't you hear me? That little voice from across the ocean--" Seunghyun pitches his voice obnoxiously high and squeaks, "-- _Daesungieeee!_ "  
   
Every day, every concert, Seunghyun's heart wasn't at his station in Seoul but across the Sea of Japan, singing along with Daesung and his legions of fans inside the walls of those great big domes.  
   
His own Dome Tour. Daesung has outdone himself.  
   
"You never had anything to worry about," he says. "You really don't give yourself enough credit for the things you accomplish."  
   
"My team--"  
   
"I know, without the team so much of what we do wouldn't be possible," Seunghyun jumps in and cuts him off. "But without _you_ there would be nothing at all."  
   
Instead of answering, Daesung sips meekly at his drink, and something switches on in Seunghyun. If Daesung when he's bold gets Seunghyun's blood running hot, Daesung being bashful brings it to a boil-- in the best of ways.  
   
Maybe the two of them can do something about that before he goes. But first...  
   
"Fine," he says, pretending to be sour about it, "Just ignore me while I'm over here trying to make you _see_ \--"  
   
Daesung sucks in a breath-- and with it a mouthful of wine.  
   
" _Hyung_ ," he coughs, eyes watering.  
   
"--how fuckin' _amazing_ you are up on that stage--"  
   
"Please--"  
   
"--but hey, drown me out, that's cool, whatever. I'll get through to you someday, somehow."  
   
"You _are_ getting through to me," Daesung croaks. "And I'm not ignoring you, It's just _embarrassing_. What am I supposed to say to all that?"  
   
"Thank you?" Ten years of this-- ten years!-- and he still hasn't learned to take a compliment.  
   
That surprises a laugh out of Daesung.  
   
"Thank you, hyung. Really! But please... no more."  
   
Seunghyun backs away, hands in the air. "I'm done. I've said my part."  
   
"Okay. By the way," Daesung chirps and raises his glass again, "I'll have you know I didn't drink at all for the two months I was recording!"  
   
"So you're making up for lost time."  
   
"Yes."  
   
And with that the glass tips back, the wine inside it disappearing between Daesung's plump lips, black on pink.  
   
Seunghyun stares at those lips and for one mouthwatering moment imagines something else slipping between them. Daesung isn't the only one impatient to make up for lost time. Seunghyun is just as thirsty, but not for wine. Not this time.  
   
"I feel partly responsible for this," he says, looking on while Daesung downs his drink. He never drank this much wine before Seunghyun started started offering him his stash, inviting him to share. He fears he's created an monster.  
   
"Don't," Daesung says. "I know what you're thinking. I was enjoying red wine long before you started bringing me bottles and begging me to split them with you."  
   
Seunghyun snorts. "Maybe I just like to think I've rubbed off on you at least a little in the ten plus years we've known each other."  
   
Not missing a beat, Daesung winks. "You sure have," he says and plunks his now-empty glass back down on the table.  
   
_Oh, so that's how you wanna play_ , Seunghyun thinks a sliver of a second before he pounces, fingers digging into Daesung's ribs. Nothing says vengeance quite like _tickle torture_.  
   
" _Hyung_ \--" Daesung shrieks, or tries to around a lack of air, "Stop! I can't _breathe_ \--"  
   
"Ain't no fun," Seunghyun laughs, but gives Daesung a break. His breathless laughter lights a fire in him, but he's going a little red in the face and he doesn't exactly want his favorite feline passing out on him.  
   
"I thought you'd like that," Daesung wheezes with arms wrapped protectively around his ribs.  
   
"I did." _Maybe a little too much._ "Anyway, what gives? All those years I snuck bottle after bottle into your room to try together-- and later, your house-- but you're the cat here. You should be the one bringing me things."  
   
"Things?"  
   
"Gifts."  
   
"Oh, right."  
   
"Just don't bring me anything dead."  
   
"Don't worry. I won't," Daesung says, nose scrunching in disgust, and Seunghyun knows his word is good. Predator hybrid though he may be, he has this curious tendency to fear just about anything that moves. Be it a bird or a bug, if it even looks at him wrong, Daesung is gone.  
   
_"What's so terrible about pigeons? They're not so bad," Seunghyun had asked him one cold, rainy day when they were out together and a flock of pigeons milling about had blocked their path. It'd taken Seunghyun's interference-- running into their midst and shooing the birds away until they'd taken to the air, fleeing the scene in a flurry of wings-- for Daesung to pass through._  
  
_"Their eyes are scary," Daesung had mumbled into his scarf, the fabric piled so high around his neck it obscured the lower half of his face._  
  
_"And worms?" Seunghyun had asked later when a round of heavy rain left the sidewalks littered with them._  
  
_"They don't have eyes," Daesung replied, looking so terribly troubled about it... and that was when Seunghyun lost it._  
   
It's silly, and even a little sad at times that he scares so easily, but if Seunghyun secretly cherishes every chance he's given to step in and save him. Because really, for all Daesung has done for him over the years, a little bug-stomping or bird chasing is the least he can do.  
   
Daesung sighs dramatically.  
   
"I'm not good at gifts. My feline side is failing me," he says, though without any real regret. He does, however, get Seunghyun a glass and pours generously, filling it nearly to the rim.  
   
"Like I said..." Seunghyun grins, tapping him on the chest with one hand while he accepts the drink Daesung hands him with his other, "Gotta be some dog somewhere in you."  
   
"You could put some in me right now."  
   
Seunghyun nearly spits out the swig of wine he'd just taken; it climbs up his nose instead, burning all the way.  
   
"What the _fuck_ ," he chokes out around the fire in his sinuses. "You--"  
   
Daesung claps a hand over his mouth. His face is scarlet as Seunghyun snatches him up by the scruff and shakes him hard.  
   
"That was _amazing_. I'm _so_ proud of you," he says, _thrilled_. Daesung only ever talks like that when he's deep in the snare of his heat, too horny to care what comes out of his dirty mouth as long as it gets him what he wants: _fucked_.  
   
"Proud?" Daesung cries, eyes blown wide, but that big grin of his gives him away; he loves what just came flying out of his mouth just as much as Seunghyun does.  
   
"It's no wonder your fans are so hungry for you if this is how you are with them. Damn, Daesung."  
   
"They have become more dangerous lately..."  
   
"Of course they have. They're taking cues from you."  
   
In the end Daesung agrees with him. "It is my fault, isn't it?"  
   
"I wouldn't call it a fault, but at least you admit it," Seunghyun laughs and lets him go. "Look at you. Our little kitten is all grown up. And it only took twenty-eight years."  
   
"Yeah, well..." Daesung looks past him, eyes catching on something in the other room. "This 'kitten' wants to sit down now. Come with?"  
   
Seunghyun smoothes a hand down the bottom half of his tail as he goes by.  
   
"Hey. Hey, say something else. Talk dirty to me, Daesungie."  
   
Daesung's groan of embarrassment is somewhat muted by his collapse onto the couch, cheeks still a little pink.  
   
"Yeah, yeah, glad you liked it. But that's all you get for now." He touches a hand to his face. "God, you'd think I'm in heat or something."  
   
_Not in heat, just horny_ , Seunghyun thinks with a leer.  
   
On that topic...

Now it's his turn to bite his lip. He knows he shouldn't be asking this, it doesn't concern him, not really, but... cat hybrids aren't the only types who routinely fall prey to their own curiosity. Dogs are inquisitive too, and about one very specific thing Seunghyun is dying to know.  
   
"How'd that go, anyway?"  
   
Daesung blinks up at him.  
   
"My last heat?"  
   
"...Yeah."  
   
Seunghyun waits, half-expecting something like _Why do you ask?_ Or maybe even _Mind your own business_.  
   
"It was a little... lonely." Daesung shrugs, surprisingly laid-back about it.  
   
"Lonely?"  
   
"And long."  
   
Seunghyun falls silent again, not sure what to make of that. Long? Lonely?  
   
Daesung scratches at his nape where he'd been grabbed earlier and continues, "I didn't, um. Want to bother the other guys. So I didn't."  
   
"Bother?"  
   
Seunghyun can't believe it. Does Daesung really think he's _bothering_ them when he calls on them to come and help him through his heat? Sure, it leaves Seunghyun wrung out, but it's a fatigue he welcomes. He never sleeps better than when he's had a roll in the sheets with Daesung, in heat or not. His bottle of prescribed sedatives sits untouched for days after, his roiling anxiety smoothed over and serene as the glassy surface of a lake at sunrise. Daesung is his own personal sleeping aid, no prescription needed... just an invitation.  
   
Something about Daesung does Seunghyun a world of good. He'll return the favor anytime.  
   
"Okay, so, you just, what... went it alone?"  
   
Daesung hesitates, suddenly having second thoughts about spilling his secrets. No surprise there.  
   
"You could say that. Unless you count my toys as company." He seems to shrink into the couch with every word.  
   
"Why?"  
   
Seunghyun knows how hard waiting out the heat alone can be. Even taking matters into his own hands never gets Daesung the relief his body really wants, craves, _needs_. A fact Daesung has made abundantly clear with each passing year, turning to his friends and bandmates to get him through the worst of it.  
   
Seunghyun is appalled Daesung would go and willing deprive himself like that... but also secretly pleased.  
   
"It's just... after what almost happened last year..." Daesung trails off. "And it didn't feel right? Not after last time."  
   
Last time. _Last time_ was months ago, but Seunghyun still relives it in his dreams, still wakes up some mornings with wood to polish and other mornings with the deed already done, a familiar stickiness in his shorts. _Last time_ is, he suspects, the reason he sometimes catches his colleagues back at the barracks giving him knowing looks as he clambers out of his bunk and does his absolute best to ignore the pull of dried come against his thighs. One of these days, with a little work and a bit of luck, he might even find a way to stop thinking about _last time_.  
   
He joins Daesung on the couch.  
   
"What, the others don't measure up?" his big mouth lets slip before he can stop it. Damnit.  
   
Oh well. Better that than the alternative: _saving yourself for someone?_  
   
"Something like that," Daesung says, leaning into him.  
   
They're already close, side by side like this, bodies lined up from knee to shoulder. To connect, Seunghyun has only to turn his head and let the other's gravity pull him across those last few inches.  
   
The kiss he lays on Daesung's cheek earns him a smile, so he goes in again-- and this time he's greeted boldly by lips under his, Daesung turning to meet him. He's all soft skin and aged wine-- and wet heat inside, Seunghyun finds, his thirst not quenched by the dry kisses Daesung always seems intent on starting with.  
   
"Mm, hyung," Daesung sighs into his open mouth. Seunghyun swallows it up eagerly. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, but all he feels is _famished_.  
   
"Missed this," Seunghyun growls into Daesung's mouth, prying it open with his own and feeding the sound into him, driving it down his throat, just in case he's anywhere near as starved as him. "Missed this-- missed _you_ \-- so fucking much."  
   
Seunghyun's heartstrings are tied to all his boys, little cords that connect them, little lifelines that sustain them, but around this one he's wound tightest of all. Now that they're together again, Daesung's face close enough to take between his hands and taste, he can't imagine ever parting.  
   
They could, however, stand to get closer.  
   
"So you were saying earlier..." he hints, nibbling at the neck bared to him.  
   
"Yeah," is the immediate answer, even before the question is out.  
   
"You wanna?"  
   
"Yes, _yes_ ," he's pretty sure he hears, a little distracted by the hand sliding down his front, Daesung's fingers feeling over his fly.  
   
The button has just been thumbed open when Daesung stops and pulls back.  
   
"I want to, but--" A quick peck on the lips and Seunghyun is left staring up at him, Daesung's warmth disappearing and feet taking him around the couch, _away_ , before Seunghyun knows what's happening. "But there's something I, uh, need to do first?"  
   
Seunghyun scrambles to his feet and follows, dumbfounded. "What? Where-- where are you going?"  
   
"Just need to..." Daesung cocks his head toward the stairs.  
   
"Bedroom?"  
   
"Bathroom," Daesung squeaks, face flushing.  
   
"To take a shit?" Seunghyun blurts out, most of his brain still between his legs or left behind back on the couch.  
   
"To take a _shower_!" Daesung shoves at him; Seunghyun just manages to catch himself before he tumbles over the back of the couch. "Gross, hyung."  
   
"Why do you have to shower? You smell fine to me." Throwing his arms around Daesung's trim waist, he turns his face into his neck and inhales deeply. "Mm, better than fine. You smell good. Great. Divine."  
   
Truth be told, he just smells like Daesung. Like skin and a hint of soap from the shower he surely took that morning-- or, at worst, the night before-- and just a trace of sweat. And under it all, something heavier: the heady scent of sex. It wakes him up all over, heart pounding and blood pooling in all the right places. He buries his nose in the dip between Daesung's collarbones and breathes him in again.  
   
"You sure about that?" Daesung says, peering down at him with ears perked.  
   
"I'm a dog. I would know."  
   
"You're only saying that because your nose is buried in my neck," Daesung sighs, petting his furred ears with a light hand. "You wouldn't like the rest of me right now."  
   
"Daesung." Seunghyun leaves his neck to look him dead in the eye. Does he know how long he's been waiting for this? "I do not give one fuck right now if you have something going on down there. I'm not asking you to smell like roses. Just, please--" _before I go out of my goddamn mind with need_ "--let me touch you. I'll suck your dick too." _And when I'm done, please suck mine?_  
   
"Wow, hyung."  
   
"Mmph," Seunghyun returns his face to its former post.  
   
"I just wasn't expecting you today, you know?" Daesung's hands go back to his ears, a finger running along their soft edges. "Wanna make sure I'm clean. For when you're in me."  
   
Seunghyun's head comes up so fast he clips Daesung in the chin.  
   
" _Ow_ \--"  
   
"You're gonna let me?"  
   
And fuck, he doesn't mean to act so astonished, but Daesung doesn't usually like to be fucked when he's not in heat. Just one of life's disappointments he's learned to live with.  
   
"Only if you don't try to _break my jaw_ again."  
   
"You never let me," he says, awed.  
   
"What do you mean _never_ ," Daesung sighs, still rubbing at his chin, his ears trained sideways in uncertainty.  
   
"You're not in heat."  
   
"Yeah, well..." Daesung folds into himself a bit. "It's been awhile. Maybe I missed you too."  
   
For that Seunghyun has no words, only hope-- perhaps the most dangerous notion of all.  
   
"And I told you, I spent my last heat alone. I miss... that."  
   
"'That?'" A wicked grin tugs at Seunghyun's lips. "What's 'that?'"  
   
"You know." Daesung peers at him through splayed fingers, face hidden in his hand.  
   
"You're so cute," Seunghyun croons, "when you're trying to ask me to fuck you without, you know, actually asking me to fuck you."  
   
This time, the bloom of color across Daesung's face extends down his neck and chest, disappearing beneath the collar of his shirt.  
   
"Are you okay? You're turning red all over. Wait." Seunghyun springs at him and hoists his shirt _up_ while at the same time tugging the waistband of his jeans _down_. "I wanna see how far down this goes--"  
   
Moments later the shirt is on the living room floor somewhere behind him. Or possibly on the couch. Maybe draped over a lamp if the way Daesung's eyes peer over his shoulder in concern means anything.  
   
But Seunghyun isn't looking at what's behind; his eager eyes are feasting on what stands before him.  
   
Daesung didn't get a chance to wash up before he showed up, but if he hadn't said anything Seunghyun doubts he would have even noticed. He looks _delectable_. Good enough to eat. Seunghyun doesn't care if he's squeaky clean or not, would never turn Daesung down for something so minor as being a little dirty.  
   
Daesung, clearly not sharing his views, turns and _walks away._  
   
"Okay thanks hyung for the help undressing," he throws over his shoulder, hurrying away. "Shower time!"  
   
Seunghyun shadows him through his room. "Why? Why? Your bed is _right there_." He gives it a mournful look as they pass by.  
   
"And my shower is right in here," is the smooth reply as Daesung steps into the adjoined bathroom, leaving the door open. Naturally, Seunghyun follows him in.  
   
"I'm serious. Let's skip the shower, go straight to the sex."  
   
"You dirty dog."  
   
"Let's just be gross together, okay? Okay?" Seunghyun knows he's whining now but he can't stop himself, all that discipline they drilled into him in basic training-- and again at the academy-- burned away at the sight and smell of Daesung up close and personal.  
   
God, he needs a fucking _muzzle_.  
   
"Don't be so grubby, hyung, like when we were filming for that silly camping show." Daesung pauses to step out of his pants, one leg at a time, his long tail in the air behind him for balance. "I still can't believe you didn't wash your hands before handling all that meat."  
   
"Do I have to wash my hands before handling _this_ meat?" Seunghyun says, making a sudden grab for Daesung's crotch. He almost makes it, fingertips just brushing the front of Daesung's black boxer-briefs... before he's suddenly scurrying away, out of reach again.  
   
_Fuck_ feline hybrids and their unyielding need for hygiene.  
   
Just as Daesung is stepping into the shower, Seunghyun seizes his tail by the tip, stopping him before it can disappear behind the fast-closing shower door.  
   
"Can I join you?"  
   
"Do you even have to ask?" Daesung says with a smile that is entirely too pleased. He holds the door open just enough for Seunghyun to slip in-- after leaving his own clothes in a messy heap on the floor, of course.  
   
And just like that he forgets what he was ever upset about.  
   
Under the spray Seunghyun gets them both off while Daesung goes to work prepping himself, pulling their hips together with one hand and lining up their cocks with the other, making good use of his long, tapered fingers to stroke them both in tandem. Not that Daesung truly _needs_ much prepping. If they were doing this during his heat he wouldn't need it at all, the careful fingers teasing over his hole, testing; the slow stretch as they dip inside; the gradual give of his body until he's open enough to take something larger than just fingers. No, he'd be slick and ready for Seunghyun the moment he walked through the door. Long before that, even.  
   
Omega. Feline hybrid. What a combination.  
   
Seunghyun refrains from kissing him when he comes, calling on all his self-control to keep from covering Daesung's mouth with his own. He wants to hear his pleasure loud and clear, amplified by their surroundings. Daesung pushes up into the tunnel of his fist, filling his hand repeatedly with hot, hard flesh until that precise moment when his head falls back, his touch suddenly _too much_ \--  
   
\--and then the tip is spurting come over the tops of Seunghyun's clenched fingers, hot like the water down his back but thicker, and that big voice he's known and named for is bouncing off the walls and tiled floor and back into Seunghyun's keen canine ears, seared into memory like a fiery brand.  
   
_Burns so good_ , is Seunghyun's last thought before he adds his own to the mix, voice and all.

 

 

\--

 

 

Back in the bedroom, Daesung pushes Seunghyun to the bed. He sinks down onto him, settling his full his weight over his hips.  
   
"Since you took the edge off in there..." he purrs, reaching between them and smoothing a condom he plucked from god-knows-where down Seunghyun's length. "Let's take it slow this time. Okay?"  
   
Seunghyun nods, afraid words could ruin this. What if it isn't real? What if he wakes up? What if it's nothing more than a dream, Daesung's touch as he takes his cock in hand, angling him up, showing him the way to the heat between his legs, keeping Seunghyun where he wants him as he lowers himself with leisure, taking it slow just like he proposed and, oh, _fuck_ , that's good.  
   
No heat hormones to hurry Daesung along. No pheromones to drive Seunghyun wild with need, burning him up inside as he paws at Daesung like a dog left out in the cold, begging to be let in. No crimson haze clouding their senses, stealing away their sanity until, for the two of them, their purpose is reduced to just one thing.  
   
Sex, and lots of it.  
   
Here their heads are clear. Here they are more than that-- more than just two beasts blowing off steam. They're Seunghyun and Daesung without the filter between them, raw footage in high definition, and tonight Seunghyun's in capture mode: every detail he can write into memory he's taking back to the barracks with him.  
   
Daesung rides him like they have time to spare, with a rhythm that's measured and slow-- not racing to the finish like usual but savoring it, his mouth falling open around a soft moan with every silky slide of Seunghyun's cock through his hole. In, out, then in again, deeper this time as Daesung's body warms up to him.  
   
For Seunghyun, holding still to let him work is agony of the best kind. Daesung is a cat, he reminds himself, and everyone knows it's best to let a cat come to you on its own time, at its own pace, taking its pleasure when it's good and ready. And truth be told, as long as Daesung wants to do this with him, how he does it makes little difference to Seunghyun. All that really matters is that they're doing it.  
   
Like most of his kind, he isn't hard to please.  
   
"You feel--" he grunts, "--so good, fuck, _Daesung_."  
   
Daesung flips his hair out of his eyes and beams down at him.  
   
"You too," he says with the most wicked moan, rising and falling with marked discipline, never missing a beat. But that's the Daesung he knows and loves.  
   
"But, _uh_ ," Daesung gasps, dropping down harder this time-- trying to force more of him in?-- and Seunghyun can feel how he clenches up around him. "You can move, you know. It's weird when you're so-- _ah_ , so still."  
   
"Weird?"  
   
"Like fucking one of my toys." Daesung grins down at him. "You're just warmer."  
   
Seunghyun licks his lips, thinking that over. That won't do. So he does as asked, sits up on his elbows and rolls his hips up just as Daesung is coming down. The sound their skin makes when it meets gives him enough masturbation fodder to last him months.  
   
Even better, Daesung's perfect rhythm is finally broken, his breath leaving him in a rush. Seunghyun does it again before he can recover, thrusting up into him sharply. And again for good measure.  
   
"That's bett-- _ah!_ "  
   
Seunghyun smirks. Apparently all it takes is him joining in the dance for Daesung to lose his cool.  
   
Whatever Daesung was about to say is interrupted when he pitches forward suddenly. He hovers there over Seunghyun, panting, hot breath washing over Seunghyun's face as he leaves that last torturous inch for him to close.  
   
So Seunghyun does. He tips his face up to bring Daesung down, and a breath later he's sucking at Daesung's mouth, drawing his tongue out, swapping spit until their lips glisten with it-- but so what? Every smear of saliva mixed with the salt of his sweat is exactly what he wanted.  
   
And why shouldn't they be just as wet up here as they are _down there?_ Daesung is still in motion above him, his slick on Seunghyun's thighs and balls and in the dusting of hair at the base of his cock, sticking everywhere they've touched, and he fucking _loves it._  
   
He pulls Daesung closer to crush their hot mouths together and licks into him to the time of his thrusts, earning him a whimper and a full body shiver that he feels through his cock.  
   
" _Hyung_ ," Daesung moans and eases back, breaking the kiss.  
   
"Not good?"  
   
" _Too_ good," Daesung sighs and lets his eyes slip shut, par for the course when he's got something inside. Seunghyun's seen it enough times by now to know how the moment his cock opens him up Daesung's eyes close.  
   
Seunghyun, however, fights not to close his; he doesn't want to miss a thing.  
   
"I can feel you staring," Daesung says on the ends of jagged breaths. "I'm glad you wanna watch, but..."  
   
"What? I didn't think you got stage fright anymore," Seunghyun jokes. Daesung cracks one eye open and glares at him, though the effect is somewhat lessened by the look of bliss that comes over him when his next drop brings him down on just the right spot.  
   
" _Your eyes are intense_ ," he grits out.  
   
_With the show you're giving me, can you really blame me?_  
   
"It might be a long time before I see you again," Seunghyun says slowly, carefully. "After tonight, I mean."  
   
Sure, right _now_ he feels like a winner. But when he leaves here later tonight-- or tomorrow, depending on how things go-- he's half-expecting the same old nagging sense of defeat that's been following him since February.  
   
Daesung doesn't answer. Doesn't stop moving either, hips making tight circles over his, jaw gone slack with pleasure... but he does open his eyes, and that's a start.  
   
"Anything you want to give me I'm taking back with me," Seunghyun continues, throat going a little tight. "Even if it's just memories. It'll get me through."  
   
"That's... poetic, hyung," Daesung says, and glides a hand up Seunghyun's front to rest over his heart. "A little painful too."  
   
Seunghyun wonders if he feels how, under his light touch, it skips a few beats.  
   
"You're always saying I seem starved for affection. Poking fun at me for it. Well now I am-- _really_ am." He cracks a grin, humor driving the ache away for the time being. "So come on. Throw this dog a bone?"  
   
Daesung matches his grin and then his hips are jumping forward, his dick pushing into Seunghyun's hand, the head striking his palm and leaving behind a smear of pre-come.  
   
"How about this one?"  
   
Seunghyun laughs. He really should have seen that coming.  
   
"Okay, that was _bad_ ," he says, fingers curling around the head of his cock without much thought. "But also pretty good I guess."  
   
"You liked it."  
   
"I like it when you do _that_ ," Seunghyun groans as Daesung's thrusting into his fist-- and back out of it-- takes him back onto his cock hard.  
   
"You'll never hit on good jokes if you don't stumble through a few bad ones."  
   
"Uh huh," Seunghyun grunts, not wanting to argue. He doesn't even have the means to, not when all his blood has left his brain to pool below, in a place that Daesung has full control of at the moment, slipping up and down his length like he's been practicing for it. Seunghyun isn't sure how much skill it takes to ride a cock, but Daesung sure makes it look easy.  
   
"Come on, hyung. Don't just hold it," Daesung whines. He gives himself a quick stroke from base to tip, bumping Seunghyun's hand at the end. "Making me do all the work here."  
   
Seunghyun follows his hand down on the backstroke; Daesung lurches forward again.  
   
"You were doing so good on your own," he teases. "Didn't look like you needed help."  
   
A pink tongue pokes out from between Daesung's bitten lips, and that's all the answer he needs. Seunghyun grinds his wet palm over Daesung's tip, and those hips jolt again, the move so dramatic he almost pops right off him.  
   
" _Oh--_ " Daesung yelps, reaching behind himself to steady him and nearly losing his balance in the process. Seunghyun can't help laughing as he overcorrects.  
   
"Maybe you do need some help after all."  
   
But the grin is wiped right off his face when Daesung slams onto him again, pulling him back into his tight heat and shocking the breath out of him. At the same time something soft brushes Seunghyun's balls, and it's just a split second before he recognizes it as Daesung's tail.  
   
He digs blunt nails into Daesung's thigh.  
   
"S-- sorry," he stutters when Daesung comes down again, and this time stays down, choosing instead to rock his hips with him sheathed inside. "Fuck, _fuck_ , it's a good thing you're so..."  
   
"Hmm?" Daesung gazes down at him with eyes that are half-lidded, everything about him right now oozing sex appeal.  
   
"Built for this," Seunghyun forces out, his unoccupied hand on Daesung's leg stroking up and over his hip. "Bet you could go all night if you wanted."  
   
_Or if you could find someone to keep up with you_ , he thinks a bit desperately. He's been there, done that, too many times to count during Daesung's heats. And every time, without fail, Daesung outpaces _and_ outlasts him. It's pretty incredible, actually.  
   
"Maybe I could. But can you?" is the reply he gets, and damnit, sometimes it's like he's in his head.  
   
"Oh, fuck you."  
   
Daesung laughs, delighted.  
   
"Please do."  
   
"Okay, okay," Seunghyun says, but first, he has one last request. "But maybe you could... turn around first?"  
   
Daesung throws his head back with a groan of frustration, light catching on the sweat coating his neck.  
   
"Really? Right now? Really?"  
   
"Just for a minute! You know how I am. I want to... see." Hope has his tail thumping against the bed, just the little bit at the end that isn't squished underneath him. "Please?"  
   
With a roll of his eyes that Seunghyun is sure he wasn't meant to see, Daesung goes up on his knees until Seunghyun's cock slips free, slinging a leg over him and showing him his back. He soon descends again and the press of his body over every last inch of Seunghyun's swollen cock, that pinprick of a hole unfurling and absorbing his length until there's nothing of him left to take, Daesung's perfect ass flush against his groin, is...  
   
Did someone turn up the heat? Seunghyun is sweating hard in seconds-- they both are, heat pouring off them where they're joined while everywhere else their skin touches there's the slip-slide of sweat smoothing the way.    
   
There's a reason he likes going in from behind. Forget the sounds, the smells, even the sweet torment of Daesung's ass clamping down around him; the sight before him is all the visual he'll ever need to get himself through those long, dark, lonely nights in the barracks.  
   
Daesung eyes him over one shoulder.  
   
"This what you wanted?"  
   
"Yes, you're the _best_ ," Seunghyun breathes, eyes locked on that strip of skin where one of them ends and the other begins.  
   
Daesung turns away, and in doing so his tail tip swings out and swipes Seunghyun across the bridge of his nose. He flinches, not in pain but in surprise; it hurts about as much as getting socked in the face by a cotton ball.  
   
"Watch the tail though," he cautions, "Wouldn't want it to end up between someone's teeth."  
   
"Oh, sorry," Daesung says, not sounding very sorry at all, but he does move his tail aside all the same. And then, with hands braced on Seunghyun's knees, he picks up where he'd left off: fucking himself excitedly on Seunghyun's reddened cock.  
   
And Seunghyun desperately wants to keep looking, of fucking course he does, but if he keeps watching that action he's going to lose it a lot sooner than he likes. Daesung initiated this. Daesung wanted this and took matters into his own hands to get it. If he blows his load now, he lets Daesung down.  
   
Daesung deserves better.  
   
As a man, Seunghyun has a duty to his country. As an alpha, he has a duty to his omega. Even if, strictly speaking, Daesung isn't actually his. Yet.  
   
"Daesung, you need to-- sorry but--" He grits his teeth until they grind. "You need to turn back around right now because I'm not gonna last like this, and--"  
   
And he isn't sure if Daesung will want his knot, but if he does and still wants his help getting off Seunghyun's gonna need to get him facing forward, needs them face to face. Maneuvering while tied is more than just tricky business, it's downright perilous. Best to get into position beforehand and stay there.  
   
Daesung's face when he comes back around is smug, like the cat that got the cream. Which, if he keeps moving like _that_ \-- faster than before, wilder, like maybe he's finally done with going slow, like maybe, just maybe, he's ready to reach the end they're both speeding toward-- he's about to.  
   
Seunghyun comes with that visual, waves of heat propelling him to his melting point, Daesung's sated grin not once faltering while he plants his feet and takes him by the hips and ruts up into him hard, his balls drawing up tight and emptying into--  
   
The condom, as usual.  
   
Just minutes later his knot is swelling, locking them together, and since Daesung makes no move to climb up and off him that's when Seunghyun finishes him off.  
   
"Can't believe you're letting me do this too," Seunghyun says, beyond amazed. He's upright now-- easier to give Daesung that helping hand he'd asked for, the pumping action of his arm from this angle more natural than when he'd been on his back.  
   
" _Ah_ ," Daesung gasps, pushing into his fist. "Your-- your knot?"  
   
"Yeah. I thought you didn't like it unless... you know."  
   
He worried earlier that he'd been dreaming. It wouldn't be the first time. It sure is nice, Seunghyun thinks, when life steps in and proves that some dreams do come true.  
   
Daesung doesn't get the chance to answer, his own orgasm swiftly catching up to him under the urging of Seunghyun's skilled hand, for not the first time that evening. Seunghyun holds him close while he shivers through it.  
   
Not like he has a choice, tied as they are. He's locked in; he couldn't move away even if he wanted to.  
   
Daesung wiggles atop him experimentally.  
   
"I wouldn't say it's _bad_ ," he murmurs into his shoulder. "Just... something about being in heat makes it so much _better_."  
   
"You're too fuckin' good to me," Seunghyun sighs. "Come here, you. Hyung wants a kiss." Daesung folds into him, boneless-- even his tail is at rest, laid out behind him on the bed like he simply dropped it there and couldn't be bothered to move it. So Seunghyun steadies him with an arm around the small of his back, and guides him into a kiss with a hand in his hair, now a choppy gray-blond. The silver dye is washing out.  
   
Daesung's desire to do this with him may fluctuate with his cycle, but Seunghyun's cravings are constant. As far as he's concerned, being with Daesung? Anything he gives him, anywhere, anytime, in any amount... it's always good.

 

 

\--

 

 

They pass out after, wrapped around each other at the start but drifting apart as the evening wears on, Seunghyun on his half of the bed and Daesung on the other. It's nice for a while, the companionable silence.  
   
But soon Seunghyun's had enough of silence, and that's when the words start.  
   
"I got tested," he says into his pillow. Not exactly the lead-in he'd wanted, but there it is.  
   
Daesung barely stirs, content to keep catnapping.  
   
"For what?" he voice floats up lazily some time later, sleepy eyes little more than slits. Like most of his kind, Daesung's ability to doze is... well, it's a talent of his. An innate skill of sorts. One Seunghyun wishes he could share.  
   
"Just to make sure I'm... um."  
   
"Clean?"  
   
"No, not that." Rolling onto his back, Seunghyun flaps a hand in the air like it might help him find the words he doesn't quite know how to say. "To make sure I'm not, you know... firing blanks."  
   
"...Okay. That's good." Instead of going to his back like Seunghyun, Daesung flops onto his front and blinks over at him with inquiring eyes. "But why?"  
   
_Don't play dumb_ , Seunghyun bites his tongue to keep from saying. _You know why._  
   
He shrugs. "Just wanted to be sure."  
   
"You saw a doctor and everything?"  
   
"Well, yeah."  
   
"I hear they're making an app for that," Daesung says brightly, rising up on his arms. "I read about it online. We can check with our phones, no microscope required. Pretty cool, huh?"  
   
"Yeah, that's... cool."  
   
"A little creepy though," Daesung says, looking dubious. "Don't know if I'd want to."  
   
Seunghyun is silent, and Daesung gives him a thoughtful look.  
   
"Is this is about what Youngbae said?"  
   
Seunghyun throws his arm over his face so he doesn't have to face Daesung when he says, "Little bit."  
   
"Hyung, that was so long ago."  
   
He doesn't reply. He knows not to take to heart words spilled in anger, knows Youngbae hadn't meant a lick of it... but it had haunted Seunghyun all the same, the seed of doubt growing. After the last time he and Daesung had hooked up for his heat, after how he'd lost his fucking _mind_ and begged Daesung to let him _breed_ him-- a little unhinged as he'd babbled on about _just once, just **once**..._  
   
He needed to know. That it was still possible. They'd always been careful, but he needed reassurance that their good fortune over the years hadn't been because of anything physically wrong with him. He needed confirmation that he was, in fact, healthy. That there was still the chance he could give Daesung that one day. That they could give _each other_ that.  
   
That is, if Daesung is ever even open to the idea.  
   
"You and your tender heart. You know he didn't mean it," Daesung says, turning to him with his usual soothing smile-- and _that_ is the reason Seunghyun's heart is still so open and soft after this many years. That smile right there.  
   
"Whatever. Doesn't hurt to check." The peace of mind was worth the hassle, and the embarrassment. "Anyway, I'm good. All systems go."  
   
"Well then, fire away," Daesung tells him, cheeky. He stretches, chest flat to the bed, ass high, tail curling in the air above him and adds, "Just keep that condom on tight. And check it after, like we've always done."  
   
_Almost always_ , Seunghyun thinks with a twinge of guilt.  
   
"Yeah, um, so... there's another thing." And here it is. He's afraid his heart might break out of him, the way it hammers away at the walls of his chest.  
   
"Mm?"  
   
"You've always said that I'm straightforward with my feelings."  
   
"Because you are," Daesung says into his arms. "Usually."  
   
"I just think... Well. We've been doing this for a long time..."  
   
"After our military service is over we go back to being Big Bang again." If all goes well. Even that is still up in the air right now. A lot can happen in five years. "Then what?"  
   
"What do you mean?"  
   
"I mean, what comes next?"  
   
Daesung is silent for a long time. Seunghyun holds his breath, fear freezing his lungs where they lie, still, in his chest.  
   
"...What are you asking me?"  
   
"About us?"  
   
"Oh." Daesung picks at a loose thread in the blanket. "Hyung..."  
   
"Just wondering, is all. If there might be something else besides... whatever this is."  
   
"Bang mates?"  
   
When Seunghyun turns, he finds Daesung peeking at him with mischief through his messy hair. He gives him a flat look.  
   
"Very funny," he drones. Even though it isn't, not really. Not right now, at this present moment.  
   
"Sorry. Sorry."  
   
_This isn't the time for your jokes or your puns. Or whatever wordplay you can come up with to get yourself out of talking about this_ , Seunghyun would like to say, if only he could find a way to go about it without sounding so cold. He wants to talk this out like adults, not leave Daesung feeling scolded like a child.  
   
Because while he loves his sense of humor, Daesung's deflecting won't work on him. Not this time. This topic is too important to ruin with witty one-liners.  
   
He wants them to be more than what they are. Wants to be more for Daesung than just his fuck buddy-- more than his friend, even. _Boyfriend_ sounds pretty good to him. There's another word he never dares think, but that doesn't keep it from creeping into his dreams where it dangles before him like a carrot on a string.  
   
_Husband_.  
   
For Daesung he'd change his name. He wonders if, for him, Daesung would do the same. Wonders if it's ever crossed his mind, how good their names would sound combined.  
   
Seunghyun has built up a library of maybes. _Maybe_ this, _maybe_ that. Maybe one day he'll have good reason to go through his collection. With Daesung for company, he could work up the courage to reach for those old volumes, plucking just one off the shelves to start with after years spent denying himself. He'll brush off the dust and open it up, all his secrets laid bare, the stockpile of his desires on full display. Who knows? Daesung might even like what he finds written inside.  
   
"Look. You probably don't want to talk about it. But I thought I should say something before I have to go away again. Just in case."  
  
_In case you feel the same way. In case you don't._  
   
Seunghyun's heart is on his sleeve, hanging by a thread. How much time does he have, really? How long can he go on like this, worrying over when it will fall?  
   
"Hyung..."  
   
Daesung sits up, and the way he looks down at him with such sorrow in his dark eyes makes Seunghyun feel sick.  
   
_I love you_ , he says in his heart, something in him shrinking in despair. _I want you. All to myself. No more sharing, no more passing you around like a piece of meat. Let's be exclusive. Just us. You and me. Please?_  
   
"Probably shouldn't have said anything, huh?" he tries weakly.  
   
"The thing is... this isn't exactly a good time."  
   
"For...?"  
   
"This?" Daesung tries, his voice dreadfully small. "To have this talk?"  
   
"Will there ever be a good time?" Seunghyun mourns, something flooding him-- not exactly relief, but a measure of his strength comes back to him at least, his poor heart heavy but still hanging on.  
   
He'd been bracing for a _no_.  
   
"After. When we're Big Bang again... we'll talk then," Daesung says worrying at his lip. "You said it yourself. You have to go away again."  
   
Seunghyun's chest aches at the reminder, at the prospect of leaving again. As if sensing his pain, Daesung's fingers curl around his.  
   
"And soon it'll be my turn," he continues with a sad smile that Seunghyun thinks doesn't suit him at all. "Every man serves... Even omegas. You alphas don't get to have all the fun."  
   
"Yeah, fun," Seunghyun grumbles. "Still wish there was some way we could have gone in together." Not just at the same time but actually _together_.  
   
"That was never an option. Not for us," is Daesung's quiet reply, heavy with resignation.  
   
Omega males aren't exempt from military service. As long as they're healthy and fit to serve, their country welcomes them, but only so long as they're kept apart from their alpha peers. And for good reason. The segregation is often necessary. At least in omega-only divisions their cycles won't interfere with their work. Throw even one alpha in the mix and things have the potential to get messy.  
   
"I know. Doesn't hurt to dream though."  
   
_That's a fucking lie. It hurts too much._  
   
"Except for these small breaks, we're set to be apart for the next-- what, three, four years? If we did this, you'd be asking me to..." Daesung falls silent, struggling. "What I am supposed to do while we're apart, if you and I are..."  
   
He gives Seunghyun a helpless look.  
   
Seunghyun sees what he's getting at. Of course he does; he's always known it. More now than ever, it's selfish to ask Daesung to hold back, to save himself, for his sake. An omega's heat is a powerful force, one he can't-- _won't_ \-- put pressure on Daesung to suffer alone. He loves him too much to put him through that.  
   
"I get it. You don't have to say it," he mumbles, memorizing the fit and feel of their joined hands.  
   
"There's a time to talk about this. I just don't think it's now."  
   
"But we will talk?"  
   
"Yes." Daesung's hand squeezes his, decisive. "We will."  
   
"So... this isn't a yes. But it's not a no."  
   
"Yes. No. Wait." Daesung's eyes and nose scrunch up in confusion. "How am I supposed to answer that?"  
   
"So that means it's a maybe?"  
   
"It might be," Daesung says, and gives his hand a tug. "It's a _we'll talk about it then_."  
   
"But until then..."  
   
"We continue as we are?" Daesung suggests, and finally faces Seunghyun fully. "That's okay, right?"  
   
"Yes. Of course. Absolutely."  
   
"Okay. Good. That's good."  
   
"Yeah." And then Seunghyun doesn't know what else there is to say.  
   
As for Daesung, the skin around his eyes pinches, straining in the silence between them-- and then something breaks.  
   
"I'm so sorry, hyung, I am," he says in a rush, "I know you've been waiting and you've been so good about it but I just it's--"  
   
"Okay, stop that." Seunghyun pulls back on the hand over his, dragging it-- and the rest of Daesung-- in close, tucking him under his chin puts a stop to the stream of apologies. Soon enough Daesung is making himself comfortable atop his new pillow.  
   
"Well. Now you know," Seunghyun says. _If you didn't already_.  
   
"Mmhmm," Daesung hums, and the vibrations pass from him into Seunghyun.  
   
"Guess this means the cat's out of the bag, huh?"  
   
Daesung _groans_ and hits him, and the sting that follows does nothing to dim Seunghyun's smile. He isn't the only one here who likes jokes.  
   
"Who's the one making lame jokes now?"  
   
"I learned from the best," Seunghyun says, and though he can't see it with Daesung's head on his chest-- can only feel his lips curling against his skin-- that earns him a smile.  
   
So they've put the conversation on pause, but it isn't like they've stepped backwards. To Seunghyun it even feels a bit like progress. Minimal, but better than nothing. An ongoing chapter in a continuing story: theirs.

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

 

 

When Seunghyun wakes the next morning in Daesung's bed, he's alone.  
   
He grabs his phone off the nightstand and checks his Instagram feed, grinning at the flood of comments that had poured in overnight on the few posts he'd managed before passing out. Just artwork he'd liked enough to share, the usual. No photos of from the night before, nothing that might give away his whereabouts. Daesung would have his head.  
   
He finds him at the table, that big nose of his buried in the day's paper.  
   
"You're like an old man," he growls in his scratchy morning voice, shuffling past him to see if he's left him any coffee in the pot.  
   
"I _am_ almost thirty."  
   
"Careful," Seunghyun warns. "I'm older than you."  
   
There's a long pause before Daesung replies, like he needed to give it some serious thought, "...Says the baby."  
   
"I should scruff you for that," Seunghyun says, dropping into the chair across from him with coffee in hand-- success!-- and Daesung pulls the newspaper closer. Hiding from him. Hiding his grin, probably.  
   
Seunghyun flicks one of his ears, visible over the top, and grins at the cry of surprise it gets him.  
   
"But I won't. Because yeah, I'm kind of a child at heart."  
   
"You are." Daesung lowers the paper and treats him to a sweet smile. "In some ways you're innocent like one. I like that about you."  
   
"Innocent?" Seunghyun wonders just how innocent and childlike Daesung thinks he really is. There's nothing remotely innocent about the things he wants to do to him when he gets him alone. "I don't know about that."  
   
"Hmm," Daesung says, reconsidering. "Maybe not innocent. More like open with your feelings."  
   
_Which must be why you're able to read me like a book_ , Seunghyun thinks. _Wish I could do the same with you._  
   
Something on the table catches his eye.  
   
"What are these?"  
   
Between them lies a pile of colored envelopes, many of them covered in quick doodles of hearts and stars and the like. He sees _D-LITE_ in big block letters on one, and on another a drawing of that silly little mascot of his-- that fucking _smiling thumb_ Daesung calls _D-kun_. All have been opened.  
   
He plucks one from the pile and peers inside at the folded up paper.  
   
"Fan letters?"  
   
"I read them sometimes," Daesung confesses, shrinking behind the paper again. "When I need a reminder."  
   
Seunghyun stands and leans across the table, one arm on its wood surface.  
   
"Come here," he says, coaxing the paper down with a finger. Beckoning.  
   
"Hyuuung."  
   
"Here I am, standing before you for the first time in months--" Not technically true since, you know, yesterday, but fuck it, "--and all you want to do is read the paper. Hyung feels rejected."  
   
"Does hyung always talk in third person?"  
   
"Only when he's being neglected."  
   
"Neglected? Is that what you call last night? We took it slow but somehow I'm still so fucking _sore_ \--"  
   
Seunghyun shushes him with a finger to his lips. Then taps that same finger against his own.  
   
"I'm not asking for much. Just a kiss," he says, tilting his head down and peering up at Daesung with his best puppy eyes.  
   
"It's never just a kiss with you," Daesung says with blatant fondness, and he's right, but Seunghyun isn't going to admit that. Daesung holds too much power over him already. He doesn't need him playing the _I'm always right and you know it_ card. Even if he always is.  
   
"Come on," he tries again, tail wagging behind him, low and hopeful. "Just a quick one. A little peck. Teeny weeny."  
   
When Daesung's lips touch his a moment later, Seunghyun yanks him in close, opening him up fast and wide so his tongue licks over the roof of his mouth, turning his promise of a tiny peck on the lips into a full-on tasting.  
   
Upon release, Daesung sways back, dazed.  
   
Then he frowns.  
   
"I really need to leave a toothbrush out for you."  
   
"If you're getting me you're getting my morning breath too," Seunghyun declares, feeling rather smug after what he just got away with. "It's a package deal."  
   
"Gross, hyung," Daesung complains, scooping up the paper he'd dropped when Seunghyun's tongue had been down his throat. "There might be a spare in the drawer by the sink. Go, brush your teeth."  
   
"You know, I'm not the slob you make me out to be. Just because I'm a dog--" He throws a small fit, not really meaning any of it. Sometimes it's just nice to vent, to be heard. "You cat types think you're so high and mighty--"  
   
"I think _someone_ needs to go back to bed," Daesung counters. "It's still early. Want me to come tuck you in?"  
   
"You're not my mom."  
   
"Nope, just your babysitter."  
   
"...Babysitters don't give blowjobs," Seunghyun says, thinking back to the last thing they'd done before lights out last night.  
   
Daesung laughs then, the sound bubbly and bright. They're still only playing, after all, and like any proper dog-- or child, for that matter-- Seunghyun loves to play.  
   
"Not to babies, no," he says, eyes sparkling, "But I'll make an exception for you. Does baby need a suck? Will that put you in a better mood?"  
   
_I'd like to suck on **you**_ , Seunghyun thinks. Sure is nice to have his very own adult pacifier. If only he could take him along with him wherever he goes.  
   
"Is that an offer?" he says, not caring one bit how hopeful he must sound. Why should he? Let Daesung know how much he hungers for him, how much he craves his attention. No point in pretending not to want it when Daesung is practically offering it up on a silver platter.  
   
He'll be open with his feelings. Because, if what Daesung said is to be believed, he likes that about him. And that leaves Seunghyun's heart lighter than it's been in months.  
   
Daesung folds up the paper and lays it on the table with a deceptive calm. His eyes when he turns back to Seunghyun are hot and heavy with promise, and-- _damn_ , Seunghyun thinks, feeling a little fried already. It's a good thing these sweatpants he borrowed are so nice and roomy. Those bedroom eyes get him every time.  
   
"I'll be in the bunk. Waiting." He ducks into the hall. Then doubles back just seconds later, poking his head around the corner to add, "I'll take care of you too. Obviously."  
   
Daesung laughs. "If you say so. Actions speak louder, you know!" Then, "Thanks for thinking of me though."  
   
_I'm always thinking of you._  
   
Seunghyun passes the bathroom on his way in and thinks of the extra toothbrush somewhere in that drawer by the sink. No, he hasn't brushed his teeth yet, because he doesn't have a toothbrush here and didn't plan ahead enough to bring his own. But maybe someday he will, and not just a spare in plastic packaging, hidden deep in a drawer somewhere, forgotten.  
   
Out of sight, out of mind. That's not how Seunghyun operates.  
   
Maybe someday Daesung will leave one at his place too. Maybe everything of theirs will merge, becoming one-- one cup for their toothbrushes, one bed for them both, one house to make a home.  
   
One future for the two of them to forge, together.

 

 

 


End file.
